The Rob and Vicki Engagement Page

This is to tell you the story of how Robert Whyte and Vicki Cleaver came to be engaged to be married.

Rob and Vicki both post to the usenet group called aus.tv. This is where television in Australia is discussed and they have a keen interest in this area. As a spin-off from this there is an IRC discussion channel called #austv where aus.tv posters chat, mostly in the evenings, about all sorts of things - not just television.

Vicki had noticed Rob around but hadn't taken very much notice of where he lived. She believed that he lived in Sydney. Rob *had* noticed Vicki and had visited her web page, but hadn't said anything to her other than general chatting on the main channel.

One night everyone was discussing live television shows they had seen recorded and Rob posted the URL of a page where there was a photo of him with Paul McDermott from Good News Week. Vicki went to look at it like she did with most URLs posted on that channel.

At the first sight of Rob, Vicki caught her breath. Never before had she looked at a photograph of a guy and instantly thought "YES!". Vicki had a policy *never* to flirt online - she had seen the trouble others had gotten into by doing it. But she wanted to say *something*.

Finally she decided to private message Rob and tell him she thought he was "cute". "Cute" seemed an innocuous enough word, and considering he lived in Sydney, so she believed, what harm could it do?

So the private message was sent from Vicki to Rob with the immortal words "I just visited that URL and I think you are rather cute". Rob replied with "Well I've visited your homepage and I think you are rather cute too", because he had visited Vicki's homepage and had been taken by the smile on her face in the photo there.

Vicki was floored. This was definitely not a response she was expecting! How did she get out of this now, she wondered? At least, she believed, he was 1000 km away.

She decided to keep chatting. Couldn't do any harm, she thought, and besides he did seem like a nice enough kind of guy. During the course of their discussion, he mentioned a suburb in Brisbane only 10 minutes drive away from Vicki's house. She asked Rob if he had been to Brisbane and he replied "I live only a few kilometers from your place"!

Once again, Vicki was speechless. Now, not only had she flirted with a guy, but flirted with a guy who lived so close to her! What had she done? Her first thought was "How do I get out of this?" but for some reason she just kept on chatting.

Rob was kind and understanding. They discovered that they had many things in common. They enjoyed many of the same television shows, the same food, the same movies. Chatting, in IRC like this, continued for a couple of nights. Rob and Vicki became more comfortable with one another and then the inevitable happened - Rob asked Vicki to meet him for coffee.

Vicki had only agreed to meet one person off the internet in her five years involved with it and that had been a total disaster. She had vowed *never* to agree to meet someone again. But they had become what she believed to be friends, so Vicki finally agreed to meet Rob for coffee at a local shopping centre. She figured there would be lots of people there and she would be safe. It was set for the following Monday.

Rob was a lot more relaxed about the meeting, having met several good friends online. He agreed to this meeting hoping that he and Vicki would hit it off sufficiently to become friends. He didn't dare to hope for anything more...

During the days that led up to their meeting, Rob and Vicki continued to chat on IRC. They also exchanged ICQ numbers and spoke on the telephone a couple of times. Their similarities were obvious - already they couldn't believe how much they had in common. They discovered that they could talk easily, almost as if they had know each other for years.

And so Monday, 30th October, 2000 rolled around. Vicki got to the meeting place under her own steam (as any person wanting to meet someone online should do). She also organised for a friend to telephone her mobile about 15 minutes into the date to give her an "out" should she require it. She figured that way if he seemed really creepy or totally boring in real life, she could say that something had come up and leave. Rob arrived on time. Her first impression was with his height. He is 6' 4" tall and she has always found height appealing. His first impression was of that delightful smile. They wandered to the coffee shop, ordered and sat down.

They had spoken many times of the fact that they both had Palm Pilots. The first thing Rob did was hand Vicki a purple cover for her Palm. He knew that purple was her favourite colour and he had received a free case in an online promotion but unfortunately it wasn't for the model that he had. He therefore decided to give it to her. Vicki was very impressed with a man that turned up bearing gifts - especially one that was so appropriate! Their first couple of hours together were reserved - certainly more reserved than they had been when chatting online. Although both felt comfortable, they were nervous. To fill in the gaps they started saying "Hmmmmmmmm" and "So". After a while this became a joke within itself.

When they had been together for about three hours, Rob suggested they move inside and have something to eat. It was only now that Vicki realised that her friend had never called her mobile! Thank goodness she hadn't felt like she needed that "out".

They ordered some food and sat down to eat. By now the discussion was rolling along and the "Hmmmmm"s and "So"s were becoming less and less.

The shopping centre was now starting to empty. They both realised that it was time to leave. It was only then that they looked at the time and saw that they had been together for over four hours!

During the course of the discussion, Vicki had mentioned that one of her video recorders wasn't working. As they were about to leave, Rob suggested that he could take it away as he thought he may have known a guy who could fix it for her or might even be able to fix it himself. She pondered for a moment about the sensibility of giving her VCR to a guy she hardly knew, but for some reason decided to do it. Then she realised that for him to get the VCR he would need to visit again. This, she decided, was a good idea.

Later that evening, Rob and Vicki again spoke via IRC. They chatted well into the evening. During their date, Rob had mentioned that he wanted to see the movie Shaft and that evening Vicki said that it was playing at the Drive-in just up the road from her home. After what felt like an eternity to Vicki, Rob asked if she would like to see it with him. Of course she said yes! They decided to go the next night.

But fate was not to be with them over the course of the next ten days. Vicki woke up the next morning with a dreadful virus that had her coughing and sneezing! After calling Rob and cancelling for that night, she felt terrible. They spoke on the phone several times in the next week and Vicki finally felt well enough to accept an invitation the following Tuesday to go to the movies. Then Rob rang to say that his car had broken down! It seemed like they would never be together. But finally on the next Thursday, ten days after their first date, Rob picked Vicki up to go to the Drive-in.

One date led to another, and soon Vicki and Rob were spending a lot of time together. They became inseperable. He met her friends, she met his and everyone got along well together.

At the end of November, Vicki knew that Rob was planning to go to Melbourne for some video production work and an X-Files gathering (NatGat) and due to the relatively short time they had been going out he was unable to organise for her to go with him. In their final date just before he went, Rob looked at Vicki and for the first time mentioned marriage. Vicki just looked at Rob and said "Four weeks, Rob! Four weeks!" referring to the length of time they had been together! How could she take a marriage proposal seriously after less than a month? So Rob replied with "All right - I'll give it six months then ask again".

While he was away, Vicki arranged for letters (yes, old fashioned, snail mail letters) to be waiting for him at his two hotels. Rob loved them and isn't ashamed to admit that they brought the odd tear to his eye. They spoke many times a day via telephone, email, IRC and ICQ. Once, when Rob was at dinner, he rang to say hello. Vicki finished the call with "I love you" and at this Rob shushed the restaurant (there were about 25 people there - all his friends) and yelled out "I wish to announce that I love Ms. Vicki Cleaver" to which a resounding cheer went up! Vicki was both embarassed and entirely delighted. Rob had a great time in Melbourne, but there wasn't a minute that went by that he didn't miss Vicki.

Rob finally came home a week later. They got together immediately and Rob again raised the issue of marriage. Wondering what had happened to the supposed six months, Vicki thought about it and believed that there was no good reason to say no this time, so she said "Yes".

They decided though that it wouldn't be a good idea to tell people immediately - their families in particular they felt would be suspicious of such a fast engagement. So until just into the New Year, they kept it to themselves. Finally after eating dinner with family, Vicki asked Rob if he wanted to tell his family. He replied that he did, and Vicki responded that she wanted to tell hers as well. So the very next day they told their family then their friends. Everyone was delighted! Although they tried to keep it out of their online lives for some time, it became common knowledge and soon even their online friends knew about it.

So now Vicki and Rob are planning their wedding. Keep coming back here for updates.

Read about the day-to-day life of Vicki and Rob as they prepare for their Wedding in their Web Wedding Diary!

The plans for the Wedding are coming along swimmingly! The date is October 27th and it's being held at the Northgate Uniting Church. They are being married by Rob's mother, the Reverend Janice Whyte. Keep checking back here for details of the whole day!

The Groom and Groomsmen went for their first suit fitting on Saturday 14th July. See all the details here.

See exactly what songs (and in what order) will be played at the Engagement Party!

To see photos of the Engagement Party visit here. This has been newly updated with thumbnails and then full pictures if you click on them! For the other gallery with *all* the Engagement Party photos go here!